So often in life we worry about such trivial crap. Little things that don’t really make a difference. We think they do … Until something really important socks you in the stomach. Hitting you so hard you kneel over as of you’d really been hit.

A little over a week ago I sat in my car waiting for a client to finish lunch so we could head into an appointment. Always a fidgeter I glanced at Facebook on my phone, just for a second. In the world of mundane and silly updates and tidbits were the words “The cancer has spread to my spine”.

The words came from a kind and gentle friend. A wife and mom of two young girls. A women who in her 30ish years of life has drawn more than her share of short straws and yet keeps on smiling through it.

I took a long slow breath and shook the shock from my suddenly stiff body. Smiling at my client and cursing my fidgets. The words stung. I wanted so badly for them not to be true but of course they were…

And the worst part is… I don’t know how to help. All the years of nursing, the hospice training… The knowledge means nothing when you are watching a friend endure so much mentally and physically.

What are the right words to say? Does hallmark make a card for that? I’m sorry you are being cheated out of your best years. I’m sure your kids will be okay. There is no good answer. No right words only trying to take it all in and keep breathing through it.

So there are moments. Today my work day derailed a bit and another good friend and I went to visit. To sit and to be with our dear friend, to sit in the knowledge that there is absolutely nothing we can to to fix this situation. But we can chat and we can talk about the future because through it all our bible based hope keeps us grounded. And… We can play cribbage… And we can be…

Just be. Because today we have this moment…

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